A Purposeful Break in the Routine

Life lately has been a balancing act, a constant grind, and at times an overwhelming pursuit of magically jamming 36 hours of work into 24, with no consideration for how.  Like anyone else, when I can’t fit work between 8a-8p, the day (‘graciously’) extends itself to fit the need; and all the ‘for me’ things on my docket become expendable suggestions rather than the priorities they should be.

Screen Shot 2016-01-31 at 6.03.26 PM

I have clients who have this issue constantly, because, well we’re all human beings, and my rational informed answer – to them – is that they need to make themselves a priority; you’ve got to put your oxygen mask on first if you want to be of any use to anyone else.   It’s the good old ‘do as I say, not as I do’ cliche, as I wonder if maybe I left my oxygen mask in my other bag or inadvertently gave it away in a box of old forgotten things.   During really busy weeks I will frequently basque in the irony that I own three fitness businesses and I can’t seem to get into a class to save my own life.  These are the weeks when I confuse ‘fitness’ with ‘health’ and understanding what I really need to be able to sustain a pace anywhere close to what it’s been lately.

The reality is, that sometimes you just need to give yourself a damn break; whether it’s a real unplug and go off-the-grid type break, or just the grace to be imperfectly human and an actual better, truer, version of yourself — or maybe both.IMG_7119

So here are the things that I’ve really learned, and am learning, about life and myself as I chew through the ‘too much’ that I bit off in 2016; and while I’m working on getting that balance, or ‘blend,’ back in the corner of my most productive, healthy & happy self, since lets be honest, those bites have never been, and are not likely to ever get much smaller with what I’ve got on the docket.

  1.  Fitness is everything, but it’s not the only thing.  I obviously believe strongly in fitness as a mechanism for overall health and wellness, because it is, but that doesn’t mean that 365 days a year of it is ‘healthier’ than a schedule that has balance and recovery — because it’s not.
  2. Take a break.  Whether you plot out two days a week that you go to yoga or stretch class rather than doing something higher intensity, or you literally cut-and-go on vacation – give yourself that break from the grind once in a while, and love every second of it.  Including the food that makes you say YUM.
  3. Do one thing a day that brings you happiness, for the sole reason that it makes you happy.  While I sometimes will go through a full day without a spare second to myself  the one thing that I do every.single.day., unless something is gravely wrong, is have my coffee.  It brings me joy, [relative] patience, comfort, drive, focus….and any of the caffeine generated superpowers required to not lose my shit on the days of constant demands and not-so-emergencies that pile up higher than my most lofty ambitions.  Pretty much coffee saves lives, but more importantly, it makes me happy and that in and of itself makes my life possible.
  4. Cut out the crap: the food, the jobs, the drama and the people that not only bring you down, but actually stunt your ability to do and thrive.  On the food front, rid yourself of the chemicals, but not the joy of eating.   Quit any jobs that you hate; not with abandon, but with the intentional process of setting yourself up to have a development path, to achieve something you’re proud of — because if you’re not motivated to do the work every day, you’re not the right person for the job.  When it comes to drama and the people that create it, forget them. They will always create it and they’ve got no value in your story; don’t waste a pretty little second on it.
  5. Know where you are going: life can certainly be an inexact science, but you will never regret working (and I mean REALLY working) towards achieving something.  If that process lands you somewhere a little different, well, that’s freaking awesome, but never stop learning, never stop developing, and never ever stop building for the future.  If you earn it, you will always deserve it.

And on that note, it’s back on the grind tomorrow, but I’ll be reminiscing about vacation all over the internet for the days to come.

Advertisements

On Building the New + Loving What Already Is

The first two weeks of August are typically the slowest, the quietest, and at times the sweetest weeks of the year in Charlottesville.  That pattern probably persisted again this year(traffic has been lighter, downtown has had parking) however, in the eye of the storm that is opening a new business, things have been a little different for me — again.

fuel sweat grow: b:core methods opening

Each year, for the last 4 years, most of my energy has been devoted to opening a new business between June and August, which I’m just starting to realize does have a serious impact on my summer-ing, but I still don’t think I would have it any other way.  We’re just about two weeks out from opening, and there’s no amount of pool time or day drinking that could compare with how it feels to open the doors to the warm air as we welcome our new community, new schedules, and new chapters in all of our lives.

Last week our b:core barre team met up for wine, cupcakes, and conversation around personal branding with a little touch of team building.  So pretty much we met up for all the things I love most in life, with some of the people that I love most, and it was everything.

fuel sweat grow: b:core personal branding

Over the last couple of weeks I’ve taken classes from our teachers and been completely blown away by their poise, confidence and just general mastery of their classes from the foundations of the method all the way down to the intricacies of their personal class and voice.  I’m not only incredibly impressed with the work and focus they’ve put into building their expertise, but I’m also feeling SO grateful that I have such an amazing staff that I’ll be constantly pushed to be better and to know more — and we’ll call that a goal accomplished.

fuel sweat grow: b:core barre photos

We’ve been very aware of how incredibly fortunate we’ve been to have found the coaches we did at MADabolic, how eager and invested they are in the programming, clients, and lifestyle, so now to have another completely boss staff of barre teachers, I almost can’t believe it.

This upcoming weekend is MADabolic Cville’s 2nd Birthday, so while I’m feeling up to my neck in b:core things, I’m focused on taking time out to celebrate everything that this milestone represents for our team internally, the community, and our lives on the whole.  Before we opened MAD two years ago I asked Dar to take a minute to clear space for all the things to come; all the moments of ‘firsts’, the challenges, and the people that we don’t know yet, but that were about to flood our lives with so much good that we would never be the same again.  And that’s exactly what happened.  While I’m excited to do the same again, to embrace all the new-ness that’s going to be born along with b:core, I can’t help but feel overwhelmed by looking back and celebrating all of the amazing twists and turns that came with the last two years of MADness, and all of the beautiful souls that have made it so worthwhile, and still do, every.damn.day.

So, while August can feel a little slow sometimes, we’re cranking things up over here, keeping the engines running, and preparing for the new.  I can’t wait to share some of the most exciting updates (including the new WEBSITE + b:core blog!!!!) coming this week, as we count down to the open. It’s going to be a seriously powerful kind of love coming out of the IX building downtown, and that’s the most certain thing I know.

Goal Digging My Way into 2015

This may be news to some, but it is likely the least shocking and most underwhelming declaration to those who have known me well over the last 5 years: I love goal setting. I’m a total goal digger.

fuel sweat grow: Goal digging / goal setting

At my core I’m an idea generating, relationship developing, connection making, and all around goal crushing nerd trapped inside what recently has felt like an ad-hoc life on the fast track to somewhere, but certainly no where externally defined.

In my previous life I was goal obsessed (It was borderline unhealthy).  I would ‘create possibility’ and make vision boards during every spare moment.  I craved time with friends who wanted to talk about their goals, or even better, allow me to peel away the layers to discover the goals they never knew they had. I was devastated by people who didn’t know any of their own unique passions, or didn’t want to spend all of their free time exploring their own existential purpose. I kept a notebook with me at all times where I recorded all of my ideas, projections, and complete mental regurgitations of work/life flows and strategic mind maps – it was yellow, you may have seen it with me everywhere from 2009-2011.

Sometime over the last three years I lost a little touch with that presence of mind when it comes to my own development.  I continue to build, I have ‘goals’ in the most practical of terms, but I left the constant state of possibility somewhere far behind me.  Maybe it was for the best, but maybe I can make a little room for that imagination without losing my bearings in the now.

Recently Dar became an ambassador for our lululemon showroom here in Charlottesville, and one of her first assignments was/is to develop her goals.  When she asked me to help her expand on her brainstorms and sketch out her milestones it was as if, finally, after two years of being partnered on business goals she realized my full existence and allowed me to revisit my former self.  A little too involved? Maybe, but it only took a few minutes for my arms to get tired of holding Tank up towards the sky like Simba, and eventually the Lion King theme song ended and my iPod shuffled over to some other meaningless anthem. And as suddenly as it all began, I was back to normal… but a normal that lives somewhere in the middle of the spectrum.

Last night we finally made time and talked goals.  We discussed 10 year visions, the 5 year milestones, and the now.  We contemplated what we each need to be doing right now to get started on that trajectory that we secretly hope lingers around the bend.  What’s there to do?  So much.  So, so, much, and it’s all exciting, terrifying, and overwhelming in all the best and worst ways.

fuel sweat grow: goal setting

We spent 45 minutes talking through the different exercises, the overall objective, and a few of the details surrounding our own personal milestones.  And then, of course, I spent another 45 minutes alone on my own head, scribbling out crazy detailed and psychotic mind maps to show how all of the goals, the next 10 years, and points of performance that all connect to the end goal(s).  What’s life without a little chaos? I wouldn’t recognize it.

While my actual full-blown 2015+ goals are not yet complete, there are a few big ticket items that did manage to sprout and find growth even in the darkest of times, and we’re just about ready to scream it from the rooftops….but not quite yet…

My Tribe: Wonder Women + The Countdown to Thirty

Two weeks ago one of our first ever MADville clients, and a pretty freaking awesome professor at UVa, Lisa, made/gave me this Wonder Woman mug for my coffee, of course personalized with my name on it.

fuel sweat grow: Wonder Woman VAL

If you know Lisa, you know that in addition to being an amazing super woman/mom/human who makes her family’s clothes and works out at MAD Cville almost every day at 6am, she’s also the now incredibly renowned and cutting edge Professor at UVa who teaches the Game of Thrones course that caused so much chatter this past summer.  (I mean it…you can check out more about it in these articles from the Wall Street Journal, USA Today, The Washington Post, Rolling Stone...and even Perez Hilton. There are more, but I think this sampling proves my point.)

Aside from just loving Lisa for all of her unique badassery, I also love her as a part of this amazing tribe of strong, brilliant, and driven women that I’ve been so lucky to surround myself with, and this coffee mug symbolizes that in so many ways.  I’m so grateful for all my Wonder Women.

fuel sweat grow: Wonder Woman

Today is the first day of my Birthday month, which I love, but there’s a slightly different vibe this year.  This year marks year thirty of my life — which I’ve realized I’m much more comfortable spelling out than showing in digits.  While I do feel the full weight of the manufactured milestone that thirty signifies, when think back to 25 and realize that it was just 5 years ago, I feel both slightly exhausted by the multiple life evolutions that I’ve gone through in that short time, and liberated from the weight and struggle of ‘the twenties.’

When I turned 25 I remember telling myself that at thirty I wanted to look better, feel better, and be better than I was at that moment in time.  In the last 5 years I’ve pushed myself, I’ve grown, I’ve built things that I’ve loved and things that I haven’t, but I’ve learned from every moment of it.  I’ve put myself out there, I’ve confronted fears and learned more about loving myself for what pieces of my experience I own.  I’ve walked knowingly into conflict, stood toe to toe with ignorance, and I’ve embraced more vulnerability than I thought my anxiety (or mind) would allow me to.   I not only survived it all, but I’m better for it.  I’m the better version of my 25 year old self that I committed to, and while the road was certainly more challenging than I may have ‘hoped’ for, it got me here, and I am better than fine.

My birthday is the 23rd, and in this final 22 day stretch to the next decade, I’m going to share the top lessons from the last 5 years of growing into adult hood in my own countdown to thirty.

So today on Day 1 of my #23to30 push I’m appreciating the strong women – the peers and role models – who inspire me, empower me, and fill my heart up with the courage and self-assurance to push my goals forward. In a world where competition and insecurity are so prevalent, it’s important to celebrate the soul connections of those who make you better, love you, and not only support what you’ve accomplished to date but also what you’re building towards – flaws and all.  We all need each other, and there’s something so amazingly beautiful about the possibilities when we all work together to create a collective legacy that goes beyond our ‘portfolio’ of work, to bring the power and influence to empower the next generation of women.

So to my own Wonder Women, near and far, thanks for being exactly who/what you are, and for being a part of my own development over the last 5, 10, and 29.99 years.  You’re everything.